Sucidal Thoughts

Understanding suicidal thoughts

Many people experience feeling deeply distressed and occasionally can see no way out of the pain or hopelessness they feel, which is when taking their own life might be considered.

Common thoughts that precede suicidal behaviours:

• ‘life will never get any different or better’
• ‘its all just hopeless/pointless’
• ‘the world is better off without me’
• ‘I can’t go on any more’

Problems that lead to suicidal thinking are often complex and have been going on a long time; the problems often involve a mix of individual and social factors. Despair may develop slowly as the pressures and hurts of many years wear down a person’s self-esteem. As life becomes more distressing and difficult to bear, the thought of not being alive any longer may grow more appealing. People in suicidal crisis often feel powerless because the events and pressures in their life seem to be beyond their control, except taking their own lives. Often there is a belief that suicide is ‘the only option’; this is always untrue. There is a common idea that suicide brings relief from pain but relief is a feeling that can only be experienced by being alive.Often there is a wish to escape a situation that seems impossible to handle or they need relief from an unbearable state of mind. Sometimes a suicide attempt is a way to convey desperate feelings to others.

There will be many people who have to deal with the consequences of suicide who will be deeply affected by it.

Research shows that many of those who have made serious suicide attempts and survived have ultimately felt deeply relieved to have not ended their life.

Help with suicidal thoughts

Self-help

Moving out of feeling suicidal is a possibility. Remember that it is important to know that, whatever the source of your distress or depression, it is possible to feel different and to have different thoughts about yourself and the world.

Suicide can only occur where there is both opportunity and means available. If you are aware of suicidal tendencies, ensure both do not occur simultaneously, i.e. remove any means and find people to be with. Keep away from drugs or alcohol that prevent clear thinking. Stop any risk-taking behaviour and find some safety.

It is essential to let others know how you feel and what you are thinking about. Find some that you can speak to. Seek support from a friend, your GP or call a confidential helpline. Speaking to someone can be challenging, many find relief in doing so.

Make plans to do something in the future. It can be useful to make a pact with someone, even yourself, where you build in a delay to any suicidal actions (ie ‘I will wait 48 hours before I take any action’). For example, you may commit to telephoning someone, for instance the Samaritans, who are available 24/7. (if you don’t feel you can talk, perhaps e-mailing, texting, communicating on MSN are ways of building in delays to any action).

Consider making a list of all the reasons why you have kept yourself alive until now. This can show you that you also have a will to survive. Give yourself time to do something different and to feel better.

Counselling and psychotherapy

Counselling and psychotherapy can help with suicidal thoughts.

Your next steps are..

Click here to see our 3 step guide to start counselling and psychotherapy.

Reading Recommendations

If you would like to read more about counselling, then I recommend the following books:

TA Today

Ian Stewart, Vann Joines

£11 .99

This is a comprehensive introduction to Transactional Analysis. The book is well structured and is easily read, and covering the main areas of TA theory. A great feature of this book is the examples and exercises included.
Buy this book online now

Counselling for Toads

Robert de Board

£9.99

I love this book and many of my clients do too. This is an informative story about Toad on the road to recovery from 'depression'. Counselling for Toads provides an insight into the process counselling and psychotherapy, this book should be a companion to anyone that is having or thinking about counselling or psychotherapy.
Buy this book online now

Further information and support

The Samaritans